You know you’re drunk when…you slam your car into a mobile home and then try to flee the scene on a child’s battery-operated truck! Jamie Jeanette Craft, 29, was arrested on DWI charges in Arkansas Sunday after a witness reported she had crashed her 2001 Pontiac Grand Am into his trailer. The man said Craft was dressed in a white sweat shirt with no pants or shoes on and that after the crash, she got into his son’s Power Wheels truck and tried to drive it. When police arrived, they found Craft “irate and very intoxicated.” In addition to the DWI, she was also charged with public intoxication, refusal to submit, disorderly conduct, leaving the scene of an accident with property damage and driving while license cancelled, suspended or revoked. They should ban her from all toy vehicles, too! WOMAN BECOMES A CHICKEN SITTER This sounds like a sketch from Portlandia, but it is, in fact, a real story out of Portland, Oregon. A woman has found a new career as a chicken sitter. That is, she watches over people’s chickens when they go on vacation. And apparently, a chicken sitter is in high demand in Portland. Linda Walker began learning about chickens last summer when she worked at a feed store. She decided to quit the job and strike out on her own and begin advertising her services as a chicken-sitter around town. “Need someone to care for your hens while you take a trip? Now you have someone to care for your backyard barnyard. Experienced, caring and reliable,” her flyer reads. She’s received over 20 call-backs so far! “DOLLAR-OFF” COUPON SPARKS GUN THREAT She wanted to save herself a dollar, but she didn’t save herself any trouble! A Florida woman, angry that Walmart refused to honor her “dollar-off” coupon, allegedly pulled a gun and waved it at several employees! Mary Frances Alday, 61, sought to use the Internet coupon last Friday and became “extremely upset” when a Walmart assistant manager told her the retailer does not accept such online coupons. Alday had some choice words for the manager and was escorted from the store. She then went to her car and retrieved a loaded Smith & Wesson .38 Special. She allegedly pointed the weapon at employees and stated “I have something for y’all.” The employees took cover, but Alday didn’t shoot. She instead fled the scene and was later picked up by police and charged with four counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and one count of battery. Talk about extreme couponing!

This sounds like a sketch from Portlandia, but it is, in fact, a real story out of Portland, Oregon. A woman has found a new career as a chicken sitter. That is, she watches over people’s chickens when they go on vacation. And apparently, a chicken sitter is in high demand in Portland. Linda Walker began learning about chickens last summer when she worked at a feed store. She decided to quit the job and strike out on her own and begin advertising her services as a chicken-sitter around town. “Need someone to care for your hens while you take a trip? Now you have someone to care for your backyard barnyard. Experienced, caring and reliable,” her flyer reads. She’s received over 20 call-backs so far!

You know you’re drunk when…you slam your car into a mobile home and then try to flee the scene on a child’s battery-operated truck! Jamie Jeanette Craft, 29, was arrested on DWI charges in Arkansas Sunday after a witness reported she had crashed her 2001 Pontiac Grand Am into his trailer. The man said Craft was dressed in a white sweat shirt with no pants or shoes on and that after the crash, she got into his son’s Power Wheels truck and tried to drive it. When police arrived, they found Craft “irate and very intoxicated.”  In addition to the DWI, she was also charged with public intoxication, refusal to submit, disorderly conduct, leaving the scene of an accident with property damage and driving while license cancelled, suspended or revoked. They should ban her from all toy vehicles, too!